I've been struggling. So much feels out of my control, the future is always full of the unknown, the now is feeling scary. I'm at odds with Kent, online school continues to be unpleasant, I've no Church calling, I'm full of malcontent and none of it seems to be getting better.
Today, I read in Alma 38:5 "And now my son, Shiblon," but we can easily substitute "daughter, Katherine, "I would that ye should remember, that as much as ye shall put your trust in God even so much ye shall be delivered out of your trials, and your troubles, and your afflictions, and ye shall be lifted up at the last day."
How much am I putting my trust in God? As Alma talks to Shiblon, he recounts his miraculous conversion and says, in verse eight, "never until I did cry out unto the Lord Jesus Christ for mercy, did I receive a remission of my sins. But behold, I did cry unto him and I did find peace to my soul."
I want peace in my soul. I know that peace is possible, even in times of turmoil and unrest, but I am not adequately trusting or crying or repenting. I'm not doing my part and as a result, I'm not enjoying the peace Christ offers. I was grateful for the gentle reminder to put my trust in God.
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