Newsy News

Here is an email I wrote to my mom that I felt should be here in the blog, so I have it for posterity.  It's newsy

Dear Mom,

Brandt says hi. 

There. I got that out of the way. I have been wanting to send you an email for a couple of weeks now, and this evening I thought, 'I could send Mom an email or I could vacuum.' You won out. It wasn't a difficult choice.

I wrote a very lengthy email whining for paragraphs about how bad my life is. Every time I talk to you, I whine. I decided I wouldn't send all that I wrote, but instead would give you the happy parts email. So here is my missive without all the complaint.

We have just returned from Blythe's choir concert. It was at Timpview and featured all the Centennial and all the Timpview choirs. It was really terrific! It was fun to watch the young people perform, to see their enthusiasm and hear their fine singing. The last number was a combined choir performance of Come, Thou Fount, the Mack Wilberg arrangement with organ accompaniment. It was fabulous and made me cry. Blythe looked quite elegant all in black. She wore my black jumper tied at the waist with a black velvet ribbon (so it would stay on) and a black scarf as a shawl draped across her arms. All very chic. She's such a girl, in spite of what she might say otherwise. She looked poised and sophisticated on stage with her choir, and I know she sang beautifully, even if I couldn't hear her distinctly.

Brandt did the sound for the production and afterwards showed Blythe all around the tech stuff--the sound board, up to the light booth, then backstage to see all the ins and outs of the secret spaces the audience never sees. On the way home, with Brandt driving, she said, "Brandt, you're so old. You drive, you know all the tech stuff, girls like you." 

"I'm only fifteen!" Brandt said, but I feel the same way. I sit in the passenger side of the car now, with Brandt at the wheel, and wonder how my son got to be so big. Girls do like him (one was full-on flirting with him while Blythe stood and watched; she even went and got her leather jacket so she could match Brandt), he does drive, he's tall, and he's more man than kid now.

I mentioned that Blythe has a new therapist. I hope she'll be helpful to Blythe. She has been chatting with us more and even me. Sort of. When she needs something, she'll talk to me, otherwise, it's always headphone time. We went to a bridal shower together on Saturday. She spoke to me the first five minutes of the drive to Salt Lake then said, "I'm going to put my headphones on now." I got out my earbuds and listened to my audiobook. I should rejoice in progress, however small.

Brandt is watching political stuff on the internet and then bringing up hot topics at dinner time. He doesn't like "Liberals" or Joe Biden or "woke" people and on and on. It's gotten to the point where we have banned any talk about politics at dinner and quickly steer the conversation in another direction if he is trying to deliberately get a rise out of someone, anyone, at the table. Kent and I are both delighted that he talks, and I encourage him to share thoughts and feelings with us, but we have asked that we don't talk about Biden while we eat. It upsets the digestion. 

Brandt told you about our trip to the temple on Saturday. Brandt was the baptizer for the first time and baptized Kent and me. There was a bit of a moment when he baptized Kent the first time. He had his arm up to the square, said the prayer, then, without putting his hand on Kent's back, dunked him in the water. With no help up, Kent floundered in the water a moment. Before he baptized him a second time, we had a brief talk about helping the baptisee up out of the water. 

It makes me so so happy to be in the temple with our children. It made me so so sad that Blythe chose to stay home and talk to friends on her computer rather than take an hour to be with us. I will continue to try and provide opportunities to go to the temple and hope she'll say yes next time. I didn't stay up late on Monday night, however, so I wasn't on first thing when appointments opened, so I have no appointment for March or April. Sigh. I'm ready for the temple to just be open.

*Here was a paragraph where I whined. To summarize, nothing is good. I have been without much hope.*

So, I was in the temple. Kent and I had gone to do an endowment at the City Center Temple, and at the end, I had a long time to sit and wait for my turn at the veil. I was the very last one. As I sat and waited, I prayed and poured out my heart to Heavenly Father. I explained how I felt and how frustrated I was that I can't see forward. All I see and feel is frustration and gloom. I think I even said, "I am without hope." As I stifled a sob, I was overwhelmed with a rush of hotness all through my body from my head to my toes. I was filled with the Spirit and know that God was right there, speaking peace and infusing hope. It was palpable. I didn't bother to stifle the cry and wept as I waited for the veil, then wept at the veil sufficiently that it took quite some time. 

I'm so grateful for that reassurance. Nothing has changed, but I was reminded that God is my Father, He knows me, He loves me, He is with me. I need to hold on to that while we continue to struggle along. 

Kent is busy busy at work. They have been making preparations to produce their enormous order and need only one more piece of equipment that was supposed to arrive today and will likely arrive tomorrow. I've offered to help, but so far, I haven't been needed. They got another couple of orders today, so they will be producing practically non-stop over the next month or two. I don't know that we'll see any money for all that production as all our money is going to the lawyers, but Kent tells me it's like putting money in savings as we expect to recoup it all eventually. I'm not holding my breath about that, but perhaps I should have more hope.

*More whining*

So, it is now well after 10:00pm and I do have to get children up for school and I have to go to work in the morning. I'll go to bed. I have been going over to Mikayla's most mornings. She is doing better, and her house isn't a wreck all the time. That's not me. I don't do much. Yesterday I cleaned off a two-day-old cereal spill on one of the dining room chairs. The sugars in the sugar cereal and the milk combined to make a rock-solid film of bits of cereal on the chair that had to be softened with water and scraped off with the pan scraper. It was my good deed for the day. Today I loaded the dishwasher and started a load of laundry. I also got the babies oatmeal and snuggled Freya while Mikayla and I talked about Guy's work and health insurance. I love seeing all of them at the start of the day. 

I love you! I want you to know that we pray for you multiple times a day and I think about you often. You are doing a good work, but I miss you. Courage and onward!

Love you love you,

Katherine